Mile Markers vs. Finish Lines
Mile Markers vs. Finish Lines
Transcript
So we are at all times, every moment of every day players in infinite games. There's no such thing as being number one in friendship. You don't win marriage.
You don't-- there's no winning in global politics, and there's certainly no winning in business. There are wins within, but there's no winning. And so to treat one's career in the same vein is a healthier perspective.
So in understanding and trying to understand this infinite perspective, I reached out to some Olympic athletes who are the most exaggerated form of people who are driven by the finite, win-win-win. Their entire lives organized around what they say winning the Olympics. Not only reaching it, but winning a golden whatever their sport is.
And their relationships are almost entirely formed around can you help me achieve my goal, right? My goal. A goal that has no particular value to the outside world.
Yes, you could make this argument like well, they inspire other people to do things. But that's not why they're doing it. They don't wake up in the morning going how can I inspire people today? They're waking up in the morning going how can I get gold today?
So let's-- it's an unintended byproduct. It is not a motivation, right? And what you find very often amongst these athletes-- and these are the elite of the elite, right-- is that whether they achieve their goal or not, and whether they reach the Olympics, whether they get the gold or another medal, but once their careers are over, they are very lost. They spent their entire lives after-- entirely organized around a selfish pursuit that they actually have weak relationships at the end.
They suffered depression. Michael Phelps has been open about his-- he is the most medaled Olympian in history. And the thing that he experienced afterwards was depression.
Andre Agassi became one of the most successful tennis players in the world. And the immediate response after his career was depression. Suicides are very high amongst Olympic athletes because they literally had-- their directionless because the direction that they had was goal, me.
So there's a refrain that's required. And there's a great-- and by the way, this is not all athletes. But it's disproportionately more common in athletes in athletics. There's a football player named Curtis Martin-- a hall of Famer. And he never really liked football. And he was never really driven to be the best player in his position.
It was not really his drive. [INAUDIBLE] his motivation. He was always driven to serve. And he always viewed his football career as a stepping stone along the way of serving others. But he learned very early on that if he does well, then it affords him not only a bigger bully pulpit, but also financial resources so that he can serve at a greater scale. But it was never supposed to be the goal. It was simply a step along the way, was a part of the journey.
And as a result, he's remarkably together and healthy and successful. And it was just part of the journey. And I think to change one's perspective away from winning and rather to understand that it's a position and the journey, to treat it as a marker rather than a finish line-- so like metrics are important. Don't get me wrong. And finite metrics are important, but they help us measure speed and distance. They're not the end of the game.
So you can't run a marathon without mile markers because you don't know how fast you're going. You don't know how far you're going. You can't run without a watch. You need something to tell you, right?
So to view one's job as one of the mile markers rather than the finish line. Because what happens if you get the job? It doesn't end there. It's just a mile marker.
And if you missed the mile mark, if you don't get that job, now you understand speed and distance. It's OK. And sometimes it ends up better. You get over your-- you get up over the short term and sometimes you find yourself in a better-- I mean, all of us look back and go, had any detail in my life been different, would I be where I am now?
I'm actually afraid. Like I think about all the things that I complain about in my life. And I think back, and I'm like, I'm actually kind of afraid that if I would have fixed those things 10 years ago, would I be here where I am now doing what I'm getting to do? I don't know. I mean, you could say it might be more, but it might be less.
So to view a job rather as a stepping stone and understand that the reason I want this job is so that I can do x, so that it takes me a little closer towards y, and to understand good transition, to understand what your y is, to understand what the inspiration is, what the input is helps direct that. Absolutely, you should celebrate winning a job. Absolutely, you should be excited.
Absolutely, you should be motivated by the finite goal. It is winning. But it's just like saying I'm going to hit that mile markers at this time, and then the race continues to go. And you can enjoy the thrill, but there's more. And so I think what's much healthier is to change one's perspective away from seeing the winning as the end but rather as just a marker on the journey.
You don't-- there's no winning in global politics, and there's certainly no winning in business. There are wins within, but there's no winning. And so to treat one's career in the same vein is a healthier perspective.
So in understanding and trying to understand this infinite perspective, I reached out to some Olympic athletes who are the most exaggerated form of people who are driven by the finite, win-win-win. Their entire lives organized around what they say winning the Olympics. Not only reaching it, but winning a golden whatever their sport is.
And their relationships are almost entirely formed around can you help me achieve my goal, right? My goal. A goal that has no particular value to the outside world.
Yes, you could make this argument like well, they inspire other people to do things. But that's not why they're doing it. They don't wake up in the morning going how can I inspire people today? They're waking up in the morning going how can I get gold today?
So let's-- it's an unintended byproduct. It is not a motivation, right? And what you find very often amongst these athletes-- and these are the elite of the elite, right-- is that whether they achieve their goal or not, and whether they reach the Olympics, whether they get the gold or another medal, but once their careers are over, they are very lost. They spent their entire lives after-- entirely organized around a selfish pursuit that they actually have weak relationships at the end.
They suffered depression. Michael Phelps has been open about his-- he is the most medaled Olympian in history. And the thing that he experienced afterwards was depression.
Andre Agassi became one of the most successful tennis players in the world. And the immediate response after his career was depression. Suicides are very high amongst Olympic athletes because they literally had-- their directionless because the direction that they had was goal, me.
So there's a refrain that's required. And there's a great-- and by the way, this is not all athletes. But it's disproportionately more common in athletes in athletics. There's a football player named Curtis Martin-- a hall of Famer. And he never really liked football. And he was never really driven to be the best player in his position.
It was not really his drive. [INAUDIBLE] his motivation. He was always driven to serve. And he always viewed his football career as a stepping stone along the way of serving others. But he learned very early on that if he does well, then it affords him not only a bigger bully pulpit, but also financial resources so that he can serve at a greater scale. But it was never supposed to be the goal. It was simply a step along the way, was a part of the journey.
And as a result, he's remarkably together and healthy and successful. And it was just part of the journey. And I think to change one's perspective away from winning and rather to understand that it's a position and the journey, to treat it as a marker rather than a finish line-- so like metrics are important. Don't get me wrong. And finite metrics are important, but they help us measure speed and distance. They're not the end of the game.
So you can't run a marathon without mile markers because you don't know how fast you're going. You don't know how far you're going. You can't run without a watch. You need something to tell you, right?
So to view one's job as one of the mile markers rather than the finish line. Because what happens if you get the job? It doesn't end there. It's just a mile marker.
And if you missed the mile mark, if you don't get that job, now you understand speed and distance. It's OK. And sometimes it ends up better. You get over your-- you get up over the short term and sometimes you find yourself in a better-- I mean, all of us look back and go, had any detail in my life been different, would I be where I am now?
I'm actually afraid. Like I think about all the things that I complain about in my life. And I think back, and I'm like, I'm actually kind of afraid that if I would have fixed those things 10 years ago, would I be here where I am now doing what I'm getting to do? I don't know. I mean, you could say it might be more, but it might be less.
So to view a job rather as a stepping stone and understand that the reason I want this job is so that I can do x, so that it takes me a little closer towards y, and to understand good transition, to understand what your y is, to understand what the inspiration is, what the input is helps direct that. Absolutely, you should celebrate winning a job. Absolutely, you should be excited.
Absolutely, you should be motivated by the finite goal. It is winning. But it's just like saying I'm going to hit that mile markers at this time, and then the race continues to go. And you can enjoy the thrill, but there's more. And so I think what's much healthier is to change one's perspective away from seeing the winning as the end but rather as just a marker on the journey.