The Essay
The Essay
Transcript
The dreaded college application essay.
Over the years, I found this perhaps to be the greatest stumbling block for most applicants, including service members and veterans. While you may have written countless sitreps, after action reports, or a myriad of other military documents, finding your voice and talking about your personal achievements, goals, and strengths can be a challenge. In some ways, it epitomizes the transition from military culture back to civilian life, from a mindset which is focused on service before self to one about your own personal ambitions and academic achievements.
It's time to find your voice. And it's important to start early on admissions essays to give yourself the time you need to consider and discuss your personal story. And remember, things are never perfect in the first draft. So the more edits, the better. You'll get better with practice.
With everything we know about the admission process, and what veterans like you bring to the table in terms of real world experience and leadership potential, a great essay can turn a maybe on acceptance to a college into a yes. While we don't want to give you the impression that any particular part of your application packet is more important than the others, no other area will give you as much of a chance to explain why you belong at a particular college in your own words.
This is your opportunity to flesh out all of the data the rest of your application presents. You're adding personality to your application. It can be a challenge. But remember, you are absolutely not the green 18-year-old student who graduated high school, or the individual who joined the military however many years ago. You have so much behind you already that has shaped you into the person you have become. It truly sets you apart from the rest of the traditional applicant pool. You're exceptional already.
And now you just have to show it to these admissions officers. They need to know how lucky they will be to have you on their campus. And trust us, if you demonstrate how exceptional you are in the right way, it makes their job easier too.
Overall themes that frequently come up include the following. Your background and experiences. Why you're interested in this institution. Majors, resources, et cetera. And how this college will help you reach your ultimate goals. Don't just reuse essays for different schools, but instead make sure to tailor your essay for that particular college.
You've already thought out about why a certain college is a right fit for you. This is your chance to make those reasons clear to the admissions staff. Though these questions can be fairly broad, be specific and give concrete and, importantly, personal examples in your essays.
This is where your prior research in this course will come in handy, as you will understand what the college or university offers. If a liberal arts education is emphasized, discuss how this will benefit you. If there is a specific professional school you are interested in, understand the mission of that school.
For example, a business school that stresses principled leadership will likely want to know more about your sound moral judgment and how you will contribute to the business world via an ethical lens. You will also probably find some questions that require you to be a bit more creative in how you reply. Questions like, describe a topic, idea, or concept you find so engaging that it makes you lose all track of time. Why does that captivate you? Or, what or who do you turn to when you want to learn more?
We understand it can be difficult to write about yourself. Culturally, the military tends to value a kind of humility. For some reason, it can be difficult to talk about your achievement to others. If you find it hard to explain why you deserve a spot at a particular college, if you're challenged or frustrated by the idea of selling your candidacy, or if you just feel like you're bragging too much, try this thought experiment. Imagine that your best friend, your family, your squad mates, or your supervisor sat down with the admissions committee. How would they talk about you?
Thinking of yourself in this way can help you celebrate some of your achievements. This is not the time to be excessively humble. You have a lot to offer a college. Make sure the admissions officer sees it.
As a member of the military, you may well have a very strong opinion about certain topics, and now you feel like you have the freedom to express them. Many of you may have had intense experiences on a deployment or elsewhere. Know your audience. Feel free to share, but try to avoid extremism or controversy. Part of being a student is being an empty vessel, ready to be filled up with other ideas so that you can process them and either bolster your own beliefs with them or discard them.
If you have the slightest inclination that you feel what you're writing may be uncomfortable to somebody reading it, it probably is. This isn't to say to veer away from these things, as they may be important to your story. But be mindful of your language. Personal, human stories, which are universally themed, about which you're deeply passionate, are far more likely to resonate with any reader who may pick up your essay in the process.
Many times, a service member or veteran has asked me if they should address any academic shortcomings in their record. If there is a legitimate explanation behind why you failed a course, then absolutely. For example, perhaps you were suddenly deployed and couldn't coordinate dropping a course in time, or you really struggled in high school, have the grades to match, but took a community college course in the same subjects later, and with great success. Point out deficiencies if you can explain them, or show your reader how you made an effort to improve later.
We all need to be allowed to grow up. So even our mistakes and mishaps can be worth telling if we've moved beyond them and indeed, grown from the experience as a result. One veteran I counseled, who was attempting to transfer to a highly selective university, was able to have his previous academic failures in certain courses at his previous college expunged by returning there and retaking those courses. In the end, while it took a bit more time, he was able to change his failures into success, and did it so well he was accepted in his bid to transfer to one of the top schools in the country. Now that's a great story to tell, which clearly demonstrated he had shifted into a higher gear academically, and grown as a person and student.
Don't make it too challenging by picking a topic that will require too much in-depth explanation. Keep the military terminology limited, and broaden your military experience in terms a layman can understand. Take the reader for a ride with you. Make it experiential and descriptive. Make it a good read, but also make sure to adhere to the word count. Use it all up if you need to, but don't go over.
In one of the most effective essays I've ever read, a veteran recounted how during his high school years, his siblings and he had been abandoned by their parents in their home. The two of them carried on an incredible charade in order to maintain their home and their schooling, even while the utility companies were cutting off their power and water. When the veteran finally came of age to join the service, he was able to generate enough income for himself to see his younger sibling through school. His joining the military saved both of their lives in a way, and it was through that lens that he viewed his service for his country.
Now not all of us have dramatic stories like this to tell. But we are all human, and we all have pivotal moments in our lives that shape us. These are the types of moments that make you who you are and will move readers to support your acceptance. These readers have but a brief moment to get to know you, so don't hold anything back if you think it deepens your personal story and backs up the point of your essay.
It bears repeating, get ready for this to be a process. Great writing is about rewriting. You will likely have numerous drafts before you're done if you do it right. Make sure you leave enough time to take breaks from the writing, as you'll surely get bleary eyed from looking at it over and over. Set it aside for the weekend and come back to it with fresh eyes.
When you have that draft in great shape, you'll want to get some feedback. This can come from a family member who is a great writer, a professor you trust, other veterans who were accepted to the college you desire to attend, and even admission officers if the institution allows them to pre-review essays. Just ask. Wherever you get assistance, just make sure they don't completely rewrite your essay for you. Feedback is one thing, but at the end of the day, this must be your own work.
Over the years, I found this perhaps to be the greatest stumbling block for most applicants, including service members and veterans. While you may have written countless sitreps, after action reports, or a myriad of other military documents, finding your voice and talking about your personal achievements, goals, and strengths can be a challenge. In some ways, it epitomizes the transition from military culture back to civilian life, from a mindset which is focused on service before self to one about your own personal ambitions and academic achievements.
It's time to find your voice. And it's important to start early on admissions essays to give yourself the time you need to consider and discuss your personal story. And remember, things are never perfect in the first draft. So the more edits, the better. You'll get better with practice.
With everything we know about the admission process, and what veterans like you bring to the table in terms of real world experience and leadership potential, a great essay can turn a maybe on acceptance to a college into a yes. While we don't want to give you the impression that any particular part of your application packet is more important than the others, no other area will give you as much of a chance to explain why you belong at a particular college in your own words.
This is your opportunity to flesh out all of the data the rest of your application presents. You're adding personality to your application. It can be a challenge. But remember, you are absolutely not the green 18-year-old student who graduated high school, or the individual who joined the military however many years ago. You have so much behind you already that has shaped you into the person you have become. It truly sets you apart from the rest of the traditional applicant pool. You're exceptional already.
And now you just have to show it to these admissions officers. They need to know how lucky they will be to have you on their campus. And trust us, if you demonstrate how exceptional you are in the right way, it makes their job easier too.
Overall themes that frequently come up include the following. Your background and experiences. Why you're interested in this institution. Majors, resources, et cetera. And how this college will help you reach your ultimate goals. Don't just reuse essays for different schools, but instead make sure to tailor your essay for that particular college.
You've already thought out about why a certain college is a right fit for you. This is your chance to make those reasons clear to the admissions staff. Though these questions can be fairly broad, be specific and give concrete and, importantly, personal examples in your essays.
This is where your prior research in this course will come in handy, as you will understand what the college or university offers. If a liberal arts education is emphasized, discuss how this will benefit you. If there is a specific professional school you are interested in, understand the mission of that school.
For example, a business school that stresses principled leadership will likely want to know more about your sound moral judgment and how you will contribute to the business world via an ethical lens. You will also probably find some questions that require you to be a bit more creative in how you reply. Questions like, describe a topic, idea, or concept you find so engaging that it makes you lose all track of time. Why does that captivate you? Or, what or who do you turn to when you want to learn more?
We understand it can be difficult to write about yourself. Culturally, the military tends to value a kind of humility. For some reason, it can be difficult to talk about your achievement to others. If you find it hard to explain why you deserve a spot at a particular college, if you're challenged or frustrated by the idea of selling your candidacy, or if you just feel like you're bragging too much, try this thought experiment. Imagine that your best friend, your family, your squad mates, or your supervisor sat down with the admissions committee. How would they talk about you?
Thinking of yourself in this way can help you celebrate some of your achievements. This is not the time to be excessively humble. You have a lot to offer a college. Make sure the admissions officer sees it.
As a member of the military, you may well have a very strong opinion about certain topics, and now you feel like you have the freedom to express them. Many of you may have had intense experiences on a deployment or elsewhere. Know your audience. Feel free to share, but try to avoid extremism or controversy. Part of being a student is being an empty vessel, ready to be filled up with other ideas so that you can process them and either bolster your own beliefs with them or discard them.
If you have the slightest inclination that you feel what you're writing may be uncomfortable to somebody reading it, it probably is. This isn't to say to veer away from these things, as they may be important to your story. But be mindful of your language. Personal, human stories, which are universally themed, about which you're deeply passionate, are far more likely to resonate with any reader who may pick up your essay in the process.
Many times, a service member or veteran has asked me if they should address any academic shortcomings in their record. If there is a legitimate explanation behind why you failed a course, then absolutely. For example, perhaps you were suddenly deployed and couldn't coordinate dropping a course in time, or you really struggled in high school, have the grades to match, but took a community college course in the same subjects later, and with great success. Point out deficiencies if you can explain them, or show your reader how you made an effort to improve later.
We all need to be allowed to grow up. So even our mistakes and mishaps can be worth telling if we've moved beyond them and indeed, grown from the experience as a result. One veteran I counseled, who was attempting to transfer to a highly selective university, was able to have his previous academic failures in certain courses at his previous college expunged by returning there and retaking those courses. In the end, while it took a bit more time, he was able to change his failures into success, and did it so well he was accepted in his bid to transfer to one of the top schools in the country. Now that's a great story to tell, which clearly demonstrated he had shifted into a higher gear academically, and grown as a person and student.
Don't make it too challenging by picking a topic that will require too much in-depth explanation. Keep the military terminology limited, and broaden your military experience in terms a layman can understand. Take the reader for a ride with you. Make it experiential and descriptive. Make it a good read, but also make sure to adhere to the word count. Use it all up if you need to, but don't go over.
In one of the most effective essays I've ever read, a veteran recounted how during his high school years, his siblings and he had been abandoned by their parents in their home. The two of them carried on an incredible charade in order to maintain their home and their schooling, even while the utility companies were cutting off their power and water. When the veteran finally came of age to join the service, he was able to generate enough income for himself to see his younger sibling through school. His joining the military saved both of their lives in a way, and it was through that lens that he viewed his service for his country.
Now not all of us have dramatic stories like this to tell. But we are all human, and we all have pivotal moments in our lives that shape us. These are the types of moments that make you who you are and will move readers to support your acceptance. These readers have but a brief moment to get to know you, so don't hold anything back if you think it deepens your personal story and backs up the point of your essay.
It bears repeating, get ready for this to be a process. Great writing is about rewriting. You will likely have numerous drafts before you're done if you do it right. Make sure you leave enough time to take breaks from the writing, as you'll surely get bleary eyed from looking at it over and over. Set it aside for the weekend and come back to it with fresh eyes.
When you have that draft in great shape, you'll want to get some feedback. This can come from a family member who is a great writer, a professor you trust, other veterans who were accepted to the college you desire to attend, and even admission officers if the institution allows them to pre-review essays. Just ask. Wherever you get assistance, just make sure they don't completely rewrite your essay for you. Feedback is one thing, but at the end of the day, this must be your own work.